inspired by and using some lyrics from "No Way Out" by Phil Collins

Everywhere I turn, I see hurt.
The hurt they have caused
The ...hurt I have done.
I cannot hide it
And I pray for the guidance to take away the pain.


Have you been to the temple of Amonak?
As a boy, I stepped in my grandfather's footsteps as I followed him there.
My print so small in his.
And his wrapping mine in security.
I thought him indestructible.

This place has taught me that no son of Vulcan is indestructible.
And I mourn for that loss of innocence
as I banish the thought of my strong grandfather here.

There's no way out of this dark place.
No promise, no future.
I know I cannot be free,
But I cannot see another way.

I was engineer on our ship.
Did I fail in my duty in some way?
Tell me if it was so.
What failure led to our capture?
What made us the prisoners of our Cousins?

How arrogantly they inform us of our kinship.
How proudly they declare themselves above the teachings of Surak.
This place and these actions: the gallant offspring of their refusal to denounce violence.
For this, they left Vulcan.
For this, they take pride.


My wife, my betrothed.....
My T'Pren
....was originally meant for service on our ship.
Her reassignment - I once thought it unfortunate.
Now it is my one bright thought.
She will not be a captive on this colony, this Hellguard.
Our Cousins will not have her.

My wife, my betrothed, I have failed you most of all.
It is no excuse that they used... the Fires against me.
It should not have been this way.
I have learned
that in the storm of the Time of Mating
the bond is the shelter.

It was meant to be you.
Our bond would have sheltered us.

A Vulcan's heart. A Vulcan's soul.
You are mine.

Not.... her.
No shelter, no heart's mate.
She was the storm.
And that I broke and thought of you--
--that she of all people saw you
--and showed me that I betrayed her mate with her.

Could I have not been spared that?

The child....
I have seen her.
She is their triumph.
And my failure
as they remind me.

If she had been yours...
But that will never be.

I cannot believe the words I hear.
You hold that I am to be forgiven?
To say we are not the ones responsible...
But the ones who were wronged.

That she would forgive me?

My friends....
You have given me the strength to see
just where my journey ends.

I see the path from this dark place.
I see my future.

Your forgiveness has set me free.

Our cousins will see what is indestructible
in the children of Vulcan.
Do they believe their Final Honor originated with them?

It is ancient.
It is Vulcan.
And I am its son.

Who I am
They cannot take from me.
They have stolen my life
but I can choose my death.

It will not be by their hands
Or by their will.

I am not without a weapon.
A child of the Forge knows the power of the sun.
And a student of Surak knows the power of Will.

I will match his teachings against those who refuse them.
It will be my one victory.
It and my refusal to allow more dishonor
by their pride in their atrocities.

Your offer
to bear my Katra.

I am honored.

We both are aware
It will not see Home.
As I will never see it again.

Never see again the rising sun on the desert
or the beauty of the city.
Never see the welcoming stars with all their mysteries
that led me to this life.
Never stand at my marriage place
and take the vows that would make me T'Pren's.

Your attempts to escape....
If they succeed, tell my family...
tell her...
My last thoughts are for them.
That I would be with them
for no one or no thing is more precious to me.

May they still hold me as close.

I do not mourn my death.
I mourn the life--
-- the life of a husband
-- the life of a father
that they have taken by force
and given to the Romulan.

The life of a son and brother
taken from my family.
The friend I was to those at home
and all of you.
The life of discovery.

I have one last mystery
to explore.

My footprints in the sand as I go out under the sun....
So like my grandfather's.